6 Easy ways to cultivate faith and manifest your desires
Last week I talked about my complicated relationship with faith and trust. I explained how it’s hard for me to have faith in something that I honestly don’t know is true, especially when I’ve experienced so much loss in my life. But I also realize how much not having faith that things will work out is costing me.
the problem with pessimism
Having a pessimistic attitude not only makes you feel like shit, but it can actually negatively impact the results you get in life. Studies show that pessimists have poorer health outcomes and perform less well in the workplace, not to mention the negative impact a Debbie Downer attitude can have on your relationships.
Others believe that negative emotions or vibrations energetically attract negative results, and conversely, positive emotions and vibrations attract positive outcomes. That’s the idea behind the law of attraction and the idea that we can manifest positive outcomes by thinking positively, focusing on the desire we wish to manifest, and trusting that the Universe will provide.
Whether evidence-based or spiritual, it’s clear that there are benefits to having faith and being optimistic.
So what do you do when you are a glass-is-half-empty person? Are you doomed to be miserable and attract more misery and failure? Yikes! How do you change that?
how to become a glass-is-half-full person
Luckily, it turns out that optimism and faith can be acquired through learning and practice. In fact, there is an entire evidence-based solution within the field of Positive Psychology called Learned Optimism.
But if you’re short on time and reading a book (or five) isn’t on your immediate agenda, here are some easy tips for you to get started on your journey to optimism, faith and ultimately, success:
1) Reframe your mindset
Your thoughts are powerful. They influence your emotions, your willingness to act, the attitude with which you act, and ultimately, your results. The problem is, we have something like 60,000 thoughts per day, and many of them are subconscious. It’s like a ticker tape is running through your mind all day long, and that ticker tape is, in turn, running your life. So the first step in reframing your mindset is to become aware of your pessimistic thoughts and beliefs. Once you do that, you can challenge them, decide whether they are productive, and if not, come up with more positive (but believable) thoughts to substitute.
2) Create Affirmations
This is similar to the last step of reframing your mindset where you come up with more positive thoughts to substitute for your negative ones. But in this case, you don’t necessarily need to believe the thought is true. It’s more of a fake it til’ you make it concept. This sounded fishy to me at first, but I’ve actually used this to make big moves. I used it to get over my fear of recurrence of breast cancer.
After going through a year of breast cancer treatment, including chemo and major surgery, I was understandably a bit traumatized. Every ache or pain, weird lump, or even sniffle was cause for concern. I became convinced that I was not a healthy person, and that my body would again betray me. A coach I was working with at the time suggested that I focus my attention on affirmations of health. My affirmation was simple. It literally was “I am healthy.” I said it every night before going to sleep. I wrote the phrase repeatedly in my journal. It took a while, but it worked. I am healthy. I truly feel that way and believe it now, and I am almost 10 years cancer free.
3) Meditate
Another way you can tune into your desires is by meditating. This allows you to not only see your dreams come to fruition, but it helps you to feel the energy of what it would be like to achieve your goals. If you practice this enough, you can begin to generate that energy in your life now, before the goal has been achieved. Again, going back to the law of attraction, the theory is that by living in this positive energetic vibration, you will attract or manifest the desired results. I was skeptical at first, but have really enjoyed these types of meditations and so I created one that I’d like to share with you today.
4) Practice Gratitude
Take stock of what you already have and say thank you. Thank yourself, others, and/or the Universe. Maybe you write it in your journal, in a thank you note, say it silently, in prayer, or whatever works best for you. Focusing on what you already have will generate positive feelings, which can start to have a snowball effect in other areas of your life. Having trouble finding things to be grateful for? It doesn’t have to be big! It can be the smell of a flower or fresh air, the fact that you woke up this morning, the fact that you have clean water to drink, etc.
5) Creative Expression
Tap into other parts of your brain through writing exercises and art activities. Try writing about what your ideal future self looks like, after her desires and dreams have come to fruition. What does she look like? How does she feel? How is her life different? How is it the same? What did she think and do and feel in order to get there? Another fun activity you can do is to create a vision board, either by drawing, painting, or collaging. Hang your creation somewhere that you can see it every day as a reminder of what is possible.
6) Ask for what you want
In a former life, I used to advise non-profits on how to crowdfund. One of the questions I always used to ask the fundraising team was, “What do you think is the number one reason that people donate money?” I got all sorts of responses, like Because we connected them to our message, We demonstrated our impact, and so on. But the answer is actually much more simple: Because someone asked them to. That’s right. If you don’t ask, you don’t get. So whether or not you believe in God, ask God or the Universe or Nature to grant you your heart’s desire. Please note: I am not suggesting that by praying you will cure Stage 4 cancer, or become an Olympic gymnast at the age of 45. There are limits to what is possible. But I’m suggesting that you push the limits of where you think that line is.
When I was going through infertility, I started out with a pessimistic attitude. In some ways, it was easier to believe that things wouldn’t work out because then I would be less disappointed when I got the bad news (and I had a lot of bad news). But right from the get-go, every night before I went to sleep I asked God (who again, I am not even totally sure I believe in) to grant me a child. And just as we were about to give up on my 5th round of IVF after almost 2 years of trying, we got that magical phone call. She’s 9 months old today.
If you are interested in cultivating faith in your life, but even this blog post feels overwhelming, my invitation to you today is to start small. Pick one thing. You got this!